After I settled into my new life, I became much happier because I knew I had a loving family behind me no matter what. The most influential people in my life are my mom and dad. My mom is the strongest, most independent woman I know. My dad is much more passive than my mom and has a childlike tendency about him that makes him spacey and forgetful. My mom is organized. When we have dinner, she often ends up pulling out a typed paper with topics and lists of things she wants to discuss concerning vacations, holidays, household chores, etc.
Needless to say, you can often walk out of one of her dinners feeling like you just got out of an extremely productive business meeting. She taught me to be independent and never to be a follower, but a leader. Through the sharing of photos and memories, Randa Hazzard remembers the day she met her sister, Kait. The Hazzards began their own adoption journey to Ethiopia earlier this year…. Today is an important day for my family. On this day, 23 years ago, we picked up my sister, Kait, at the airport in Des Moines.
I remember being so filled with excitement waiting for someone to step off the plane with Kait in their arms. We had given Kait a special blanket to be wrapped in, so we would know which baby she was. Up until that point, all we had was a photo taken shortly after her birth.
I had kept a photo of her in my room and looked at it often, wondering what she would be like. Little did I know, we would grow up to be so close, so alike, and such good friends. On December 8th, we always celebrate her coming into our family, and she always tells me how much it means to her.
Once our little guy joins the family, we will most definitely celebrate his special day every year, as well. Thinking about this brings tears to my eyes. I am so thankful for Kait. As I have said before, adoption is amazing! I Love you Kaitlin Kim! I Love everything about you.
Follow the Hazzard family on the journey to their son, here. Want to learn more about the wonderful journey of adoption? Click here to learn more. Through candid and often funny!
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I mentioned in my last blog that all three of my children had very different reactions to their relinquishment and adoption. In this blog I want to talk specifically about my son Jaik who has never shown or expressed an interest in — or any curiosity about — his adoption, nor does he seem particularly interested in anything related to it. When I started teaching the classes for Holt he was in his late adolescence. I actually do think that he does care about his relinquishment and his adoption but for his own reasons he just is not, in any way, ready to deal with it.
I recently read a very interesting book on this subject. Schechter, and Robin M.
Are My Adopted Kids Really 'So Lucky'? | HuffPost Life
Jaik is pretty much the perfect kid. This summer, several of us at Holt traveled to China to meet children in the Journey of Hope — a program to propel adoption of older children, or children with special needs in southern China. Upon arrival, I joined Holt China staff and local caregivers for a traditional dinner in the province of Jiangsu. Across the table from us sat three children who, along with their caregivers, had journeyed a considerable distance to meet us.
Two little boys in matching red shirts sat side by side, charming the visitors. Though shyly looking away, her eyes held a glow as bright and genuine as her smile. She giggled and chatted with her favorite caregiver — a young woman who also taught in the orphanage school. Clearly very attached to her caregiver, she also recognized Sue Liu, the sweet-faced manager of the Holt office in Beijing. Once more at ease in the company of strangers, Julie got up from the table to give Sue a big hug, and squeeze into her chair — this tall, slender, year-old girl with a Mickey Mouse button on her yellow Crocs shoes.
Awkwardly smooshed together, they sat like sisters — playful and laughing. That night in Jiangsu, Julie brought that description to vibrant, glowing life. She bounded down the hallways to greet orphanage directors and Holt staff, her long skinny legs sticking out of shorts — an outfit in which she seemed more comfortable than the frilly frock she wore for the official Journey of Hope camp the following day. And her hugs — warm and engrossing — landed spontaneous and often on their recipients. Julie entered care as an infant and has lived in the orphanage ever since.
We know there are foster homes that are less than ideal. Words of support for our family during this transition time are appreciated. Whatever difficulties may come, we are going to love this little one. When you can affirm that commitment and express trust in our desire to meet that need for love, you are being a helpful part of our team.
Let us know you think this is a good thing! We had a choice and we decided to share our home with this child. We love your words of support about our decision to take this risk and step out in faith. We love this child! Tell us something great about him. In the tough times, listen to our struggles and then remind us of those good qualities. Siegel, M. Drawing upon stunning new findings in neurobiology and attachment research, they explain how interpersonal relationships directly impact the development of the brain, and offer parents a step-by-step approach to forming a deeper understanding of their own life stories, which will help them raise compassionate and resilient children.
Once you understand your role in their journey, you will be more effective in your role as a parent. Keck helps you understand and appreciate the complicated journey that adopted adolescents face.
While it was once thought that lots of love and a good home would take care of the problems inherent in adopting a child, families and social workers now know that that is not true. Raising adopted children is not the same as raising birth children, and Maskew offers ideas and advice that are both practical and extensive. She deals with racism, problems around the holidays, disabled and special-needs children, and international adoptees. In a society that still views adoption as second best to birthing a child, Maskew sees that with commitment and support as the keys, love will come along.
D, Working with adopted adolescents is complex. The key to successful therapy and healthy development is to help the adolescent discover and accept the person within. Therapists and clinicians will discover: a broad knowledge base on adoption; a step-by-step assessment process; clinical intervention strategies; a wealth of case histories; treatment resources and therapy tools; writing and art therapy samples. Lieberman and Rhea K.
Bufferd , A guide to producing and enacting family scripts which mark key transitions in adoption for school age children. These ceremonies are a way to acknowledge the loss of transitions, even in happy situations, and provide a hopeful context to acknowledge the changing circumstances. For adoptive families, where the history is not a shared one, the rites and traditions commonly relied upon to negotiate transitions and to withstand internal or external stressors do not exist.
Culture Keeping: White Mothers, International Adoption, and the Negotiation of Family Difference Heather Jacobson, This book follows white adoptive mothers as they navigate culture keeping: from their motivations, to the pressures and constraints they face, to the content of their actual practices concerning names, food, toys, travel, cultural events, and communities of belonging.
From China, with love
It explores how women think about their children, their families, and themselves as mothers as they labor to construct or resist ethnic identities for their children, who may be perceived as birth children because they are white or who may be perceived as adopted because of racial difference. This book is useful for raising multiracial children in a color- and race-conscious world. Inside Transracial Adoption By Beth Hall and Gail Steinberg, Using a careful blend of academic research, social reality, and personal experience, this book provides creative, confident, pro-active, and provocative guidance for prospective parents considering transracial adoption for the first time and for those who are experienced veterans.
This book offers direction for building close, loving, and very real families consisting of individuals who are proud and culturally competent members of differing races. Cross Cultural Adoption: How to Answer Questions from Family, Friends, and Community Amy Coughlin, Caryn Abramowitz, Written as a guidebook for adult relatives and friends of adoptive families, this book puts the power of information where kids seek it most—in the mouths of their parents and caregivers.
Where is she from? The book outlines some of the specific issues facing multi-ethnic families, along with strategies for dealing with them.
For readers just beginning to consider cross-cultural adoption or those already in the thick of it, this fine book should be at the top of their resource list. Yet, while the stories in the book are universal, they are also deeply personal and incredibly touching.
You cannot read this book without being changed. Are Those Kids Yours? Black Baby White Hands: A View from the Crib By Jaiya John, Here is a brazenly honest glimpse into the mind and heart of that child, a true story for the ages that flows like a soulful river—separated from his mother at birth, placed into foster care, adopted, and finally reunited with his biological family in adulthood—an astounding journey of personal discovery.